3. What’s the most sensible thing you’ve ever heard someone say?
Whether it was just genetics or growing up in a dysfunctional house, lots of things made me get upset easily and often. The simplest thing, such as not being able to tie my shoes correctly, would have me cussing and highly irritated. Usually, my anger would abate as quickly as it came, but still, it was pretty alarming at how easily frustrated I could become at the drop of a hat.
My grandma was the only person in my family that was never angry. She's no longer on this planet, but when she was, I can't recall seeing her get upset once. I remember one time she burnt her hand on the stove, and even then she didn't get upset, and she had every right to. I remember gasping and freaking out for her, all while she just calmly put her hand under the tap and said "Vincent, would you please go into the bathroom and fetch me the gauze? Thank you."
After she let her hand stay under water for about fifteen minutes, she simply applied some burn cream on the wound and wrapped it up, then went back to cooking dinner as if nothing had happened. To her, it was nothing more than a small interruption. To me, it was the day I really saw my grandma as strong and level headed woman.
A year or so later, I was staying at her house fishing. She had a big lake in her backyard, and during the summer I would always stand at the edge of it, throwing stones and fishing while my grandma cooked dinner or cleaned the house. On this particular day, she was fishing with me so we would have something to eat that night. I had been trying to catch a fish for around an hour, and I hadn't gotten so much as a nibble, which was causing me to become increasingly frustrated. My grandma, on the other hand, had already caught quite a few fish, all while humming away and looking serene. Just as I was about to give up, my hands started vibrating; a fish was chewing on the bait!
I started trying to reel the line in, all while my grandma stood behind me offering words of encouragement. The pole started to bend sharply towards the water, and I had exert great effort to keep a hold of it. Right as it seemed that I would be eating my own kill for dinner that night, the pole instantly straightened up and I almost fell backwards from the sudden laxity. I reeled in the line and to my dismay, the hook was there, and nothing but air was on it.
I threw my pole to the ground and declared "I'm done!", then proceeded to cross my arms and pout. My grandma said nothing, just stooped down and picked up my fishing pole and then gently pulled apart my arms. She held out the pole and said something I still use as a mantra to this day; "If it won't matter tomorrow, don't let it matter today."
Of course, at the time I didn't quite understand what that meant, and I told her as much. "All it means," She said, turning her attention back to her own pole, "Is that you shouldn't let things that don't matter upset you. You're upset that you didn't catch a fish, but will you care about it tomorrow, or even in the next hour?"
I thought about it. "Probably not,"
She smiled and ruffled my hair. "Then don't sweat it, kid."
Since then, this has been my go-to mantra whenever I feel on the verge of getting upset (which is,sadly, quite a bit).
The guy in front of me going 20 under the speed limit? The girl who won't get out of the middle of the aisle when I'm trying to get by to get to the Nutella? The red light that just won't turn green? The lady at the checkout line who insists on using an expired coupon? I've used the mantra for all of these situations and more, and it is seriously the only thing that stopped me from either becoming irritated or flat out insulting someone.
Lots of people have told me I'm way too mellow and calm, when the truth is I get upset all the time. I just stop it before it becomes too much or materializes for all to see. I wish I could have told my grandma how much one of her many wise statements has greatly influenced and improved my life.
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